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The joint bank account and its contents are technically your finances now, of course, so you are under no obligation to tell them about it. It sounds like you would feel better if you were transparent about all of your mother’s finances. This money was your mother’s gift to you. Want to read more? Follow Quentin Fottrell on Twitter and read more of his columns here. The Moneyist: My sister became my late father’s power of attorney, took out a reverse mortgage on his home, and drained his equity. Saddened by the Loss of Mom and Suffering from Inheritance Guilt We are cordial and I am close with one sister but when finances and heightened emotions are involved, it can get hairy. I plan to have this conversation with them the next day after the funeral, and before they leave. How should I discuss the “equitable” distribution with my sisters? They will be coming down in a week and a half to attend her funeral. As the joint owner, I have access to her account by survivorship. Now that my mom has passed, we are going to discuss her estate which is significant and most of the beneficiaries on the account are my sisters - except for the joint savings account, which has a large sum of liquid cash in it.Īm I obligated to inform them of this joint savings account? I have already informed the bank, Social Security, her credit-card companies, and her retirement pension that she has passed. Since then, I cared for her in our house and even responsibly managed her finances, which gained significant interest over the years. My mom was upset about this, and asked me to be a joint owner on her savings account in 2013, after we met with her attorney.
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In order to appease my sisters and because they felt it was not fair that I inherited a house from my father (their stepfather) who also passed in 2013, I decided to disinherit a portion of my mom’s investments/annuities. My mom also wished to remain and receive care at home. Long-term care would have cost substantially more, and would have exhausted my mom’s finances. I oversaw all of her care during the evenings, even when we went on vacation with her.
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My mom received a pension and Social Security benefits, so she also had the means to afford a full-time caregiver during the days when I was at work (40 hours a week) for at least 2 years. “‘My conscience is getting the better of me, and I would like to be transparent about being the joint owner of this savings account.’ ”